Recently an old friend of mine approached me about using my blog in teaching a unit on ethics to high school students. Flattered, I drafted a short statement to address what sorts of ethical decisions I weighted in as I was deciding whether or not to become a donor.
In what way(s) did your personal ethics factor into the decision you ultimately made to become a donor?
My response:
Choosing to donate my eggs was an easy decision for me. I find nothing morally wrong with egg donation. Morally, I do not read into egg donation as being unnatural. In the past, I have personally been troubled by genetic screening, where parents choose the genetic dispositions of their offspring through invitro fertilization. This was a factor when I began researching egg donation. However, these parents had tried for years, they were not looking for a perfect child, but their child. Invitro fertilization was their last option to have a child naturally. Although they technically "chose" me out of a set of photos and questionnaires, I felt their choice was based on personal decisions made in good faith, to have a child they deserve and one that looks like them.
My family voiced their uneasiness regarding my decision. They felt it was God's role and that by creating life in a petri dish between my eggs and the husband's sperm was unethical and against God's plan. I do not feel this way. Just as we hope couples who are able to conceive naturally, these couples have, or I hope have, passion and love in their relationship.
My eggs are important, they are integral. Spiritually it came down to love, not genetics. Just as one may argue, “we are what we are because of our genes”, or someone else will argue it was how we were raised, I have no doubt their child will grow up with the same love and affection I received from my parents, whether or not they are genetically related to me.
Ultimately, it was my upmost faith in people and the personal journey each of these couples had suffered. I am grateful for my health and my supportive family. In being physically able to donate, it was the least I could do for a couple who wanted a family.
Today I was informed on how the class went: "The lesson/discussion went AMAZING and the students were all utterly transfixed by your blog and the beautiful statement you sent me." Most importantly, she added, "Thank you again for being so open and willing to share your experiences."
As I enter the professional arena, I am happy that I maintain this blog and am able to share my experiences.
3.11.2010
7.20.2009
surgery and recovery
surgery
surgery went smoothly. i arrived at the clinic a few minutes late around 7:20am. shortly after checking in (they give you buzzers like at restaurants to let you know when your table is ready) i received a call from the reproductive center wondering if i was running late. they hadn't received the information that i had checked in. i was immediately taken back, asked to go to the bathroom, changed into the hospital garb and laid down. sean came back then per my request and they preceded to get me ready for the IV. apparently i was to have been at the clinic at 7AM but i was instructed 7:15am. either way i ended up having local anesthesia administered to my hand for them to put the IV in! for the first time i met the doctor who would be removing my eggs and later placing the fertilized ovum into the female's uterus on the other side. i had spoken with the doctor a few days prior to discuss the medication she had prescribed me to help with the bloating. she was very nice and brought her assistant who would be watching the surgery.
i remember being wheeled into the OR and having 'Bob' the anesthesiologist put drug into my IV. after waking up i was given water and crackers. this time through took far less time.
recovery
the day of surgery, friday, and saturday were spent sleeping. 95% of the time i was too drowzy or nauseated to move. i took both the nausea pills and pain pills in an attempt to stage off the negative side effects but finally realized it was actually the pills that were making me feel worse. sunday i quit all medication besides the bloating medication. i was able, for the first time, to leave my apartment and grab a small lunch with sean at our favorite breakfast place, the mirth.
today i made my way to the bank to deposit my check and downtown to grab a quick lunch. by the time i made it home i was in pain and laid down. unable to sleep i spent most of the afternoon working on the logistics of moving.
i believe by mid-week i'll be back to normal activities but i don't want to rush anything. i'm happy that with this cycle i am able to rest. no school or work to force me out of bed!
this is definitely my last time. my body hates this.
surgery went smoothly. i arrived at the clinic a few minutes late around 7:20am. shortly after checking in (they give you buzzers like at restaurants to let you know when your table is ready) i received a call from the reproductive center wondering if i was running late. they hadn't received the information that i had checked in. i was immediately taken back, asked to go to the bathroom, changed into the hospital garb and laid down. sean came back then per my request and they preceded to get me ready for the IV. apparently i was to have been at the clinic at 7AM but i was instructed 7:15am. either way i ended up having local anesthesia administered to my hand for them to put the IV in! for the first time i met the doctor who would be removing my eggs and later placing the fertilized ovum into the female's uterus on the other side. i had spoken with the doctor a few days prior to discuss the medication she had prescribed me to help with the bloating. she was very nice and brought her assistant who would be watching the surgery.
i remember being wheeled into the OR and having 'Bob' the anesthesiologist put drug into my IV. after waking up i was given water and crackers. this time through took far less time.
recovery
the day of surgery, friday, and saturday were spent sleeping. 95% of the time i was too drowzy or nauseated to move. i took both the nausea pills and pain pills in an attempt to stage off the negative side effects but finally realized it was actually the pills that were making me feel worse. sunday i quit all medication besides the bloating medication. i was able, for the first time, to leave my apartment and grab a small lunch with sean at our favorite breakfast place, the mirth.
today i made my way to the bank to deposit my check and downtown to grab a quick lunch. by the time i made it home i was in pain and laid down. unable to sleep i spent most of the afternoon working on the logistics of moving.
i believe by mid-week i'll be back to normal activities but i don't want to rush anything. i'm happy that with this cycle i am able to rest. no school or work to force me out of bed!
this is definitely my last time. my body hates this.
7.15.2009
Memory in Fetus, Dutch Doctors Say - ABC News
Memory in Fetus, Dutch Doctors Say - ABC News
Shared via AddThis
fascinating!
got the go ahead a few hours ago to take the FINAL BIG shot (Ovidrel). i have to inject it exactly at 9pm. i was also prescribed a medication to help prevent the hyperstimulation i felt last time. i am extremely happy that the center thought of my trouble with my previous cycle and attempted to ease my pain. they are truly thoughtful doctors!
my surgery is scheduled for 8:30pm friday morning.
Shared via AddThis
fascinating!
got the go ahead a few hours ago to take the FINAL BIG shot (Ovidrel). i have to inject it exactly at 9pm. i was also prescribed a medication to help prevent the hyperstimulation i felt last time. i am extremely happy that the center thought of my trouble with my previous cycle and attempted to ease my pain. they are truly thoughtful doctors!
my surgery is scheduled for 8:30pm friday morning.
7.13.2009
extraction either on thursday or friday
(watching tv with her mom)
today i had my second ultrasound. the technician measured my eggs for the second time and showed they had each grown since this past thursday. i have 20 eggs, many of them too small yet. at the beginning of the cycle they mentioned wednesday, july 15th as the extraction date but now it is looking like friday since my eggs still need a few days to grow.
negatives for me:
- one more day of bloodwork
- one more uncomfortable ultrasound
- two more days of injections (4 more than i expected)
positives for me:
- sean can be with me at surgery
- my friends won't have to bust their butts to take me up to the hospital and back
- a couple days off work
i spoke with my mother last night and asked her to be at the surgery with me. although she is against this second cycle she was more than happy to come down to lawrence. i have such a wonderful mom!
changes in my body.
i do find myself more emotional, easily susceptible to dips in my mood. i've gained some weight and i feel unbalanced in my diet, exercise, and schedule. i'm sure this will all smooth out once i have surgery.
i have continued to ride my bike to and from work but have given up riding to the gym or downtown. it feels weird to take full strides when i walk as if i am pulling something inside so i take smaller steps.
7.06.2009
start of the fertility drugs!
last night i began taking the gonal-f fertility drugs along with the lo-dose HCG. luckily it only amounts to two injections: (1) 10 units of lupron + 10 units of HCG and (2) 300 UI of the gonal-f. each injection contains much more medication than before so it takes much longer. i hate quickly injecting such large amounts so therefore i inject each one slowly.
this time around getting the bloodwork done is much more nerve-racking. i'm normally pretty good about getting blood drawn but i dread each time i've had to go in. luckily i only have to get blood drawn three more times before retrieval.
this past wednesday i went up and had the suppression ultrasound which is done to ensure my ovaries are 'quiet' - they were! i weighed in 3 lbs heavier than i was before i started the cycle which could be accounted for by a number of explanations.
i've had a number of uncomfortable sensations the past few days. besides being bloated i've also had splitting headaches that i never have. i've been sore and definitely feel a weight in my abdominals. overall just slightly uncomfortable.
this time around getting the bloodwork done is much more nerve-racking. i'm normally pretty good about getting blood drawn but i dread each time i've had to go in. luckily i only have to get blood drawn three more times before retrieval.
this past wednesday i went up and had the suppression ultrasound which is done to ensure my ovaries are 'quiet' - they were! i weighed in 3 lbs heavier than i was before i started the cycle which could be accounted for by a number of explanations.
i've had a number of uncomfortable sensations the past few days. besides being bloated i've also had splitting headaches that i never have. i've been sore and definitely feel a weight in my abdominals. overall just slightly uncomfortable.
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